The Power of Self-Talk and Wellness

Self-talk is the way you talk to yourself, in other words, your inner dialogue. It impacts the way you feel about yourself, others, and the world. Self-talk can be both positive and negative. It directly impacts your self-confidence, self-concept, and self-image. Research shows that positive self-talk can increase self-respect, improve mood, and boost productivity. On the other hand, research demonstrates that negative self-talk can take a toll on your self-confidence and emotional well-being.

Research also shows that human beings are hardwired with a negativity bias, a psychological principle asserting that we’re more susceptible to negative stimuli than positive ones. In other words, negativity bias is our tendency to register negative stimuli more readily but also to dwell on these events.

A research study conducted in 2014 demonstrated that participants who used the first person when talking to themselves before a task were less effective than those who spoke to themselves in the second or third person. By using second and third-person pronouns as opposed to first-person pronouns, the participants created psychological distance, removing themselves from the stressful situation by referring to themselves as an ‘other.’ In other words, learning how to navigate your self-talk can help you calm down and be more equipped to face challenging moments.

When self-talk focuses on how you can thrive, and not just survive, it can help increase motivation. When we have motivation, it helps us achieve our personal goals. Being aware of your self-talk can help widen the view of your life and opportunities. With practice, you can learn to befriend yourself, which is to talk to yourself like you’re talking to your best friend. In addition, research finds that when self-talk focuses on the present moment and recognizing that moment and its opportunities as valuable, it more effectively helps you reach your goals.

When you notice your negative self-talk, learn how to dispute your negative thoughts. It can be helpful to think of any evidence that disproves the negative thoughts. Some helpful questions to ask yourself can be:

• Is this thought accurate?

• Is this thought a balanced and rational thought?

• Is there a more helpful thought to replace the negative one?

Another tool to challenge your negative self-talk is the power of gratitude. Gratitude is a valuable tool for rewiring negative thinking. It improves emotional well-being and boosts happiness. When you notice you’re criticizing yourself, try and focus on something you’re grateful for at the moment. With daily practice, gratitude can change your mindset.

Journaling can be a very helpful exercise in paying attention to your self-talk. Journaling allows you to increase your awareness of the content of your self-talk and whether it is helpful or unhelpful. In addition, journaling allows you the opportunity to make time to process your thoughts and feelings. If you’re not a fan of writing, consider auditory journaling, art, and music as ways of processing your thoughts and feelings.

Challenging negative thoughts is a practice of reframing your negative self-talk to create a positive shift in your mindset. It takes time, patience, and effort to learn how to challenge negative thoughts and assumptions. Psychotherapy for negative thinking, including cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can help you learn how to effectively challenge your negative and/or irrational thoughts.

If you are needing help in dealing with your negative self-talk, please consider setting up a free phone consultation and we can discuss how therapy can be helpful.